Subtitle: To Know Him is To Love Him
I considered several directions for this second post. I could vocalize additional objections (and may still go in that direction in the beginning… haven’t quite decided), I could do as I often do and probably will here (which will be to defend spending close to $100,000.00 for a theological education), or I could branch into the topics of the supernatural, prophecy and rapture that I hinted at in the previous post. The latter I decided I should do only after really gathering my thoughts and tackling one at a time, because while the same people tend to be found on the same “sides” of those same issues, I tend to jump around. So I will leave explaining that part of my belief system for another time another place.
Funny enough, after writing the last post, I sat down with a friend of mine who is in high school and my husband and he began, as he often does, to criticize my choice to spend thousands of dollars on a theological education. I will explain that here. He will probably never read nor understand it, but you will.
I come from a heritage of “smart.” Honestly, I am very very proud of my family history and how my grandparents instilled in each and every one of us a love for people and a love for education. They, together with my aunts, uncles and parents, taught me the value of an education and I will proudly tell anyone who wants to know that I am a Naz Nerd through and through. I love General Assembly (the closest event to the rapture that I have ever encountered in a very positive way. Jesus just might decide to take us all up together during the next General Assembly, and I could only hope to be right there). I love to hear people discussing dynamics of the faith, how it relates to each and every nation and how we unite so many differences in such a great familial manner.
Which is why I, with no regret whatsoever, have spent every cent I made in the years leading up to and during college, a good portion of what I earned after, and continue to spend my husband’s hard-earned income to pay off five years of theological education. The God I encountered in my years of college and seminary I would not have found in the Bible (gasp!). Yes, I will clarify. That God that I met IS there to be found in the Bible, but I could not have understood Him, would not have even seen him, if I had not had that education.
Why the Education?
1– DUH! Work and Career!
Huh?? Yes. I did believe I would earn some of the money to pay my college loans through ministry funds. I had hoped to economize and live in such a minimalist manner that I would be a missionary practically straight out of college or seminary. I STILL hope that I may one day be blessed to use the two majors (Religious Studies and Intercultural Studies plus a minor in Spanish) outside of my personal life, and I also hope that I may some day have a career or full-time volunteer life in ministry. The story of my calling and the events that led me to change from a journalism major to the path I later took is another story for another time.
2– For me, silly!
There are two ways to look at this– FOREsight and HINDsight. A significant experience confirmed by conversations with friends, professors and family who knew me best and spoke hard reality and yet love into my life convinced me that the move from journalism to relgious studies was not going to be the most profitable financial move I could make. At that moment in my life, thank God, that was okay with me. Through college more than any other time in my life I felt that there could be no price placed on the call of God and His leading. I knew that whatever He had in mind, I had to move forward in faith. Was it contra logic? I don’t think so. I made my plans, I thought things through with heart and mind. But there’s a logic in knowing yourself, what you might regret and not selling your convictions for cheap security.
In hind sight, it was so much more. I EXPERIENCED God in college. I had opportunities I would not have otherwise had to travel and see the church in Brazil, Spain, Italy, Germany and Switzerland (I did go to France for a day and a bit, but cannot say I had any experiences with the French church in that short time). I had an Intercultural Communications course which included 9 students from 8 different countries. I interacted with historical texts by philosophers, theologians, historians, artists, etc. My biology and astronomy classes blew my mind as I met a creator of life and sciences who had always been there and whom I had never known. God became huge, GINORMOUS (my favorite superlative). I learned and learned and learned and learned that I knew less than I knew I knew. Perhaps I am not so smart to try to type it all out. I sit here and I FEEL the knowledge flowing through and overwhelming me. And I love it, but cannot describe it. It isn’t the hopeless search of a detective who finds he is further and further from catching a criminal. It is a new day, waking up and being pleasantly surprised that what before seemed so routine is, in reality, a challenging adventure, comedy, romance. Regretting spending that money on college and seminary would be to regret getting to know God and His love for me and for others in a way I could not possibly have learned otherwise. Some of my college days would turn into some of the hardest days I would ever experience to that point. There were nights of tears crying why when a young friend of mine died in a car accident. Moments when family issues left me without words, not knowing what to say even to God. Those moments, and the things I learned in college that helped me deal with those moments, helped me to get through the hardest moments that followed, and continue to carry me through.
3– For Them
I do think I am smart. I try not to think I am smarter. But I do think a well-balanced theological education will teach you not only to think in an educated manner, to get through the tough questions others may ask, to have those quick and ready answers, but a good education will teach you how OTHERS think. If you read the Bible from your perspective, you will probably take from it your perspective. Now try reading a book of the Bible with several commentaries around, in dialogue with the early church and the authors of the books of the Bible, try not just saying “back then, this meant,” but getting to the heart and mind of the message. I do think the Bible can be profoundly meaningful and purposeful to anyone who reads it with a heart to hear God. I also think that it gets deeper and better when we can understand the message as the author intended, staying clear of heresies (some of which may seem just a matter of vocabulary, but when you look at some of the ways it reflects on relationships with God and with each other, it’s important to know). We need guidance. We need community. We need teachers, scholars. I see Apollo in the NT, who was greatly respected for his knowledge and wisdom. I look at the Jewish culture, which many anti-academics conveniently ignore (the Jewish culture of the time meant that children often had a theological education at home that is better than that of many of today’s pastors). One could be illiterate but know the theological implications of the prophets and scriptures.
But that’s not really the point, is it? Because anything I write always comes to the final, “So what?”
So how are you going to talk to someone who does not believe if you cannot understand their reasons for not believing?
What happens when an unbeliever knows “more” about your God than you do?
What happens when you interact with other fields of study and you just aren’t as smart?
It’s going to happen. I am no genius. People are going to present me with questions and I will not have the answer (I know, it’s surprising). But the point is to know what you can and be in pursuit of knowledge. Because the pursuit of knowledge is connected to the pursuit of God, not that knowledge is God, but that there is Truth. And that Truth is God created and even likely to be a great characteristic of God. The perfection in our location in our universe, galaxy, solar system. The creative processes of the body and mind. The relationships between people and cultures. He created this world, and you can’t be afraid of learning something that might challenge you to think He might just be that much bigger. You can’t be afraid to think. God did not ask us to close our eyes and hide from truths. We are to interact and find His Truth and then keep digging. It’s a never-ending process. And If I had another $100,000.00 I would spend it all over again if it meant me being that much closer to God, to His calling, and to my witness.