Legacy and Tradition

The holidays are a time of year to reflect, tell stories and remember. Every Thanksgiving in the past, I would spend Thanksgiving with my family in Illinois and I would spend extra days with my grandpa. We would eat hot fudge sundaes and tell stories about our family history-- stories of my dad trying to hide the fact he wrecked my grandparents' car, stories of ancestors who fought in wars, traveled distances, and my favorite story was the story of how my grandparents met.

This year I drove to Thanksgiving alone with my daughter. My husband stayed behind to work and my grandpa passed away in May. I felt alone, but my heart was full with stories and memories. It was both painful and exciting. We were still looking forward to the trip. My favorite times of year are when our extended family gets together. But the trip felt empty with my husband at home. And I felt like I was driving into homelessness without my grandpa waiting for me in Illinois.

And then I arrived at my aunt's house and everything was different. There was a tearful moment as we placed a candle where my grandpa used to sit, remembering him and the others of our family who had gone before. But from then on, something new seemed to open as we looked towards the new generation. There were 12 children ages 10 and under taking turns riding the tractor with my uncle, playing corn hole and reading stories with one of my aunts. They traced each other on the pavement with chalk, played with the animals and ran joyfully just about everywhere. I knew my grandpa had laid a foundation, had built a legacy. What I hadn't realized until that point is that in doing so, he had equipped us to do the same.

We divided his books, CDs, Christmas decorations, and other sentimental things he had gathered over time. We told stories of generations past, saw pictures of my grandpa as a child and enjoyed time as a family. I drove home from this Thanksgiving in peace; 1-- that my family would not fall apart because 2-- my grandfather's legacy was one of fmaily unity that extends through the generations.

Yesterday I ran all over town getting deals and buying our Christmas tree, preparing for our rather haphazard home Christmas. My husband grew up in a family and a financial situation where tradition at this time of year wasn't very important, and the holiday didn't arrive in any way until Christmas eve. But I carry my grandpa's legacy with me and appreciated feeling he was part of the excitement. My daughter jumped up and down in anticipation and told everyone about the live tree we picked out. Most of my ornaments are from when I was a child with the exception of some filler ornaments I bought last year and our traditional ornaments that we let Audrey pick (one new ornament each year).

Why is all of this so important? Why am I so wrapped up in tradition? 1-- Tradition is a big part of unity. Traditions may change and/or evolve, but there is a bonding line that connects us to each other through tradition. 2-- Most of our tradition speaks to something deeper-- such as the legacy of faith passed down through the ways that we remember and the stories we keep alive. And finally 3-- tradition is much more than a ritual, but is a joyful act that should bring anticipation and excitement. My daughter and I can connect in a meaningful way, reflect and tell stories and leave with our hearts full of the Christmas songs I play from my grandpa's old Christmas recordsand the tea or hot chocolate we drink as we go along. Quality time is never wasted time. And time together is the beginning, middle and end of an inheritance worth much more than money could ever hope.